Monday, May 03, 2010

THREE WISHES by Carey Goldberg, Beth Jones and Pamela Ferdinand

I received an advance copy of this book from the publisher.

THREE WISHES appealed to me right off the bat because it is the story of three women and their search for love and motherhood in their forties.  You often hear people say pithy things like "40 is the new 30" but it is nice to read a book about real women in their quest to "have it all" and the sometime bumpy path that it took to get there.

THREE WISHES follows the lives of three journalists who have achieved their career goals and are now hearing the ticking of their biological clocks.  Carey Goldberg makes the first move. Unwilling to wait any longer for Mr. Right to come along, she begins the process of in vitro with some donor sperm.  In an unexpected twist of fate, she becomes pregnant the old-fashioned way.  Carey passes the sperm on to her friend Beth who has also decided to delve into single motherhood in her early 40's.  Soon after, Beth meets someone and becomes pregnant without even trying.  Beth passes the donor sperm on to Pam who also finds love and motherhood without using it. 

Although the idea of this seemingly magical sperm is amusing, the best part of the book is the struggles that these women go through to achieve their dreams.  Motherhood does not come easily.  There are tragic losses involved in several cases.  And love doesn't arrive looking like the fairy-tale Prince Charming. The women have to kiss a lot of frogs.  They struggle out what they want and to avoid compromise in the face of a biological ticking clock. The book is also about women supporting one another as each individual boldy marches towards single motherhood. 

Even though I am married and have a child before age 35, I found this book to be really moving and engaging.  More and more women are waiting to have children and then are faced with daunting infertility issues. Sometimes, a pregnancy can go horribly wrong and difficult decisions must be made. Add to this the difficulty of finding a partner as one gets older and you can truly see the difficult odds these women faced.  The book remains hopeful and funny to the very end.

BOTTOM LINE: Recommended.  Especially for women in their late 30s and early 40s who despair of ever achieving love and motherhood.  The greatest part of this book is that none of three women ever compromised in order to achieve their dreams. It's nice to see that.

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