Thursday, January 20, 2005

Sorry I haven't written in a few days. I've felt a bit down.

I have recovered from my illness only to face the loss of a close family friend. She died unexpectedly this past Monday of complications from 25 years of taking steroids for her rheumatoid arthritis. She had the flu this past week and was having trouble with vomiting and diarrhea. She passed out on Friday and her heart stopped on the way to the hospital. She never regained consciousness.

Ginger Saulsberry was a very dear sweet person. She lost two husbands to terminal illness and suffered from severe rheumatoid arthritis for years that left her crippled. Yet, she was a person with a zest for life and a merry heart. She had a great sense of humor and was always thinking about other people. She never complained and was so fun to be with. I can't believe she's gone.

When people are taken from you unexpectedly, you can get a little paranoid. Ginger is the second person to go out of my life with no warning. The first was my father. At times like these, I start to feel really anxious. Like each time I say goodbye to someone in my life, that will be the last time I will ever see them. And that isn't entirely unreasonable to think that. But it is making me feel really paranoid.

Over the weekend, Gary caught me sleepwalking so I know this anxiety is creeping into my subconscious.

I leave for the funeral in Austin tomorrow. I hope it will be a good time to celebrate Ginger's life and her reunion with loved ones that have gone before. We will miss her.

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