Monday, August 29, 2005

My mom and Gary have helped me to work out the logistics of my move, so I'm feeling much better about that. However, I think my latest anxiety has to do with long-distance friendships.

I see my friends as family. And it makes me feel really upset to think about being separated from even more of them. It is so hard to keep in touch with people. My friend Brad who was my closest friend for many years has shut me out for some reason. I never hear from my friends Dave and Lora who moved away. (and Dave was my closest friend in Denver) I feel very removed from my friend Jennifer. I haven't seen my friend Ellen since college. And I guess I worry that this is going to happen with my friends here after I move. We'll stay in touch for awhile and then we'll quit corresponding and I'll cease to be a part of their lives. I'm going to miss seeing my friends' babies grow up. (Dave/Lora and Amy/Greg and Ellen/Jason) I'm going to miss seeing their new homes and sharing in their joys and sorrows. I'll just become this person they knew who lives in another state. And that causes me a lot of grief. And scares me. That my impact on the lives of others could be so small.

1 comment:

Ellen said...

I'm not going anywhere! (You can't get rid of me that easily.)