Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Dilemma

Okay, so more drama.

I'm going home for Christmas for the first time in several years. There has been a yearly holiday event with some of my high school classmates at a former teacher's house ever since we graduated. I've always enjoyed going and this year I may actually get to attend.

When I got the e-mail about the event, I noticed that a former friend of mine will probably be attending. He was just about the best friend I had. And he dropped me out of the blue. Just quit responding to my phone calls and e-mails with no explanation. We didn't have a fight. Nothing was wrong. He just disappeared out of my life. And I have been really hurt by it. I can't imagine what it would be like to see him again. How awkward it would be. Would I be able to be civil? I just don't know. So, now I'm not sure if I want to go. I know it sounds silly. I should just go and have a good time and see old friends that I haven't seen in years. And introduce Gary to everyone. But I'm not sure that the whole thing wouldn't be just too upsetting. What to do?

6 comments:

Genevieve said...

is this the friend who I think it is? If so, I think you should go. Don't let that stand in your way. I mean, you didn't do anything wrong!!! if anything, you went out of your way to try & figure out what the problem was.

I think you should go with the attitude of "it's [Friend's] problem, not mine."

Malady said...

(yes, it's the guy we went to college with)

That's a good point. I guess part of me still hopes for a reconciliation. It's hard to let a good friend go!

Genevieve said...

I know, and if it were me, I'd want the same thing. Or at least an explanation.

I think you should go, be polite, and see where that leads you. Say hi, introduce him to Gary, and leave the rest to him. (but I guess you will have to be prepared that that's all there might be, or even that he won't turn up, even if his name is on the email list.)

Ellen said...

Go go GO.

Of course, I know that this has nothing to do with me, whatsoever, but... well, I was "dropped" also by him. I've tried numerous times to find him/get in touch with him in the past ten years to no avail. For some reason, I have deep regret with that failed relationship, and I didn't even have the history with him that you have.

Truly, I don't think that it had anything to do with either you (or me.) I think that he was running from a lot of inner demons, and maybe some of us represented something to him that he was trying to escape.

Go! (And tell him that I've been missing him for ten years now...)

Malady said...

Thanks for the advice. If I'm able, I think I will try to go. I'll let you know what happens!

Genevieve said...

PS - me too, same as Ellen. I did keep in touch with him for a few years after college and even visited with him in California but nothing since about 1999...

makes me sad :-(