Saturday, May 01, 2004

So, not everyone knows this about me but I have a pretty big heart. It doesn't always show because I also have a pretty big temper. But I do have a lot of love in my heart for people. My greatest joy is doing things for my loved ones. And one of my greatest fears is ever hurting someone's feelings or being deliberately cruel. One of the negatives about having a big heart is that you feel things deeply. So, I tend to get hurt easily. I can get hysterical over harm to animals or even over things that happend to people I don't even know. My ex-boyfriend caught me sobbing about the girl that was recently kidnapped and found dead. He felt I should reserve my feelings for people we know. But I like to think we are a community of human beings. We should feel bad when bad things happen in our community. We should take it personally. But not to an extreme. I even take it personally every time one of our troops dies in Iraq. Because I can't help thinking about how I would feel in all those instances if that person was someone that I loved.

I am also very tactile so I tend to be physically affectionate with people. I have to remember sometimes that strangers I am just meeting might not be prepared for a hug. I tend to do what comes naturally and sometimes that means I don't respect people's physical boundaries.

I just finished reading a book last night called "My Sister's Keeper" and I found the ending so upsetting that I couldn't go to sleep. It was really good but so sad. I feel like I need to find a balance between being positively sensitive and getting carried away by my sensitivity. I guess that will be a new project for me.

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