I debated whether to post anything today because I am being a big fat baby. Maybe it's the weather. I'd like to blame it on the weather. It's dark and grey outside and there is fog swirling around. Very gothic. Kind of makes me want to go up to the roof of the library and run around like Mrs. Rochester. (although I wouldn't burn the building down...I promise)
Anyway, I just found out last night that my friend Jen is moving away. While I am happy for her because it's a great opportunity for her husband and they will be able to afford a house in Georgia, I am bummed for myself. Since I moved here to California, my friend Maya moved to Alabama, our friends Tom and Janet are in the process of living full-time in Hawaii, Jen is moving to Georgia and another new friend may be moving to Southern California. It's like rats on a sinking ship. Is the universe sending me a sign?
On the upside, I got the Mary Kay gift basket that I won on Spa Night and it was quite nice. (I am happy to report that they are no longer testing on animals) The lady came over last night to deliver and showed me and Jen a few products. She asked me if I'd like to host a party and I said, "Honestly, I don't have any girlfriends to ask." It felt really pathetic to have to say that. But I know most people don't like being hit up to go to house parties anyway so I probably wouldn't have done it even if I had people to ask. I, for one, usually enjoy house parties. They can sometimes be fun get-togethers.
Anyway, forgive my whining. I'm just blue. Or maybe it's the weather. I'm gonna blame it on the weather.
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2 comments:
I have those days too.
It's funny, when I was younger, I was so much more adventurous or resilient or clueless to changes. Move to San Antonio and not know a soul? Bring it on! New friends! Move to Italy and not know a soul! Ciao, bella!
Now... the thought of moving away from my friends and my routine (even though these things are in such a uncouthe place as ARKANSAS) scares the tar out of me. It's taken me six years to get to know my friends, and to carve my nice little rut, I really think that it would throw me into a tailspin to leave. Years ago, I daydreamed about up and leaving to California. Yet, one of my good friends is reluctantly moving there this weekend, and I was thinking, "Oh, poor Jenny! She has to move away from all of us to that nuthouse state!" (sorry, ha ha)
Anyway, I think that you are very brave for choosing to start a new life in California, and eventually, you will look back and say, "Wow! I can't believe that there was a time when I was so lonely."
the thing that I think was different about us moving to San Antonio, or Ellen going to Italy and me going to France, is that you KNEW you'd be around people you'd have stuff in common with. When we started school, so did, what, 400 other people who also didn't know anyone? When I went to France, it was through an organized exchange. There were other people like me to meet.
Not to say that's not hard. It still is, and it still takes time to get used to. But I think it's easier to do than moving when you're "all grown up."
Ellen's right. You will make new friends, and one day, you will wonder what you did without them. Just sucks that it takes so long and you have to be lonely in the meantime.
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